Middling

I just joined the 50’s club this week, and am feeling surprisingly excited about this milestone. Like people say, I do think that it’s a privilege to age, especially since my parents passed away close to 50. I don’t take any year for granted and am calling on you, my friends of DIANI who are 50 and beyond to share what you like about aging. I think as women in a society that can be unnecessarily focused on youth, it’s good to hear how wonderful middle age can look and feel…

For as long as I can remember, 50 seemed to me to mean old age, over the hill, close to retired, less active, and a lot of things that include the word, “less”. It also seemed to me to be an age of wisdom, and of having it all together. Here’s what I actually know to be true in my experience so far - I don’t feel old, over the hill, close to retired, less active. I actually feel like I know my body and mind better than ever and what it needs to feel healthy. I love being active, moving my body and using my brain, and am in tune with when I’m out of balance and what can bring me back to center. I know that there are people in my life that I can’t be without and there are those that I’ve realized aren’t meant to be in it. I trust my instincts more than ever and I believe that I can do whatever I set my mind to. 

I also don’t feel like I have all the answers, and know that I don’t have to. I like listening more than talking, I judge myself less harshly than I used to and also know that that is a work in progress. I trust the universe and the plan that it has. I like to live in flow rather than fighting against it. The wealth of memories I have from my life and all that’s happened, good and bad, comfort me and make me feel proud and grateful. Those memories act as a guide and a reminder that ultimately everything is going to be ok. Having lived a while, I’ve weathered quite a few storms, and yes, they make me stronger, but they also make me softer, more compassionate towards others, and what they might be going through.

And ultimately, I don’t have to have a plan from here on. I’m content knowing that the tools I have collected in my backpack so far will help me in anyway I need help, and carve the path that I’m meant to be on. 

I always welcome comments, but I would truly LOVE to hear any comments about what you’ve learned in your life, and what reaching this milestone meant to you. You can add comments below (you have to log in first).  Like I said at the beginning, I think sharing can really help remind each other what a privilege aging is and how wonderful it can look and feel. 

Sending lots of love,

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    2 comments

    Nella, thank you so much for sharing your wisdom. It totally resonates and is such an important thing to hear over and over that “not everyone gets to experience” aging. Congrats to you for finding your creative passions at 50 and beyond! Cheers to you!

    Caroline February 01, 2024

    Dear Caroline… I’m 72 and follow your lovely boutique and blog.. my niece lives in Santa Barbara, Kim and has gifted me with beautiful things from your store.. I felt I needed to weigh in here.. I started my business at 50, feeling it was my time after my boys were on their own way.. it was my favourite stage of life.. my fifties.. I was just beginning.. I felt my healthiest in both mind and body and went on to realize my dreams as a decorator and wedding florist..women at any age must remember to be true to themselves as they age, not be swayed by the norm or society’s values of them..: society is a harsh critic of older women.. I still wear my hair long, and dress like my heart speaks to me.. ageism is a cruel reality.. be grateful for every day and keep your creativity flowing, it will keep you young and beautiful.. embrace every wrinkle and change in your body, don’t fight it.. it’s a fact of life not everyone gets to experience… xx Nella

    Nella Martina January 31, 2024

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